How Partner Dancing Works

The relationship between a follow and a leader is pretty direct. However, it is always difficult to explain this concept to students in class. I find that a lot of people do not have experience with traditional partner dancing. The idea of a follow and a leader does not register. 

The fact of the matter is that Spanish is a sexist language. Nouns in Spanish are either feminine or masculine.

Feminine nouns include:

• nevera = fridge (because women store food in it)
• estufa = stove (because women cook on it)
• lavadora = washer (because women wash clothes in it)
• nubes = clouds (because clouds looks like boobs in the sky)

 Masculine nouns include:

• brazo = arm (because guys arm wrestle)
• carro = car (because guys drive fast)
• barco = boat (because guys like boats)
• juego = game (because guys like to play games)

esposa = wife

esposas = handcuffs

That's just a small list of sexist words in the Spanish language. But this is not a Spanish lesson.  Partner dancing does can be illustrated like this

The music will dictate or set up some guidelines for the dancers to follow. These guidelines include pace, rhythms, melodies.... The leader is responsible for taking those guidelines laid out by the song and apply them to the dance. So the leader is responsible for interpreting the music and setting out instruction for the follow. Now I know you ladies must be pretty upset by now. 

Angry Female: "You mean I have to do all the work and have to be completely submissive to a man? This is not 1950. Why can't I be the leader? We should have equal say in the dance. He should be submissive to me....."

It's true you do all the work, but the follow is what makes this partner dance work. Period. Two leaders in dancing is like having two Presidents with equal powers in the white house. It doesn't work. Also submissiveness allows the leader a blank canvas to work on. A blank canvas in dance is what makes a leader feel free in expressing his creativity.

Females often ask what they are supposed to do during a dance. It's really easy.

Listen

If a follow gets lost listening to the leader she can still listen to the music. As long as the two of you are listening to the same song at the same beat you can dance together.

What makes a good song?

That one is up to you. You can pick your own dictator. Wouldn't that be nice if it was true in reality.

What makes a good leader?

A good leader is a good follower. The leader must follow the music. If the leader refuses to follow the music than it defeats the purpose of expressing musical sounds on a visual canvas.

What makes a good follow?

A good follow is submissive while maintaining their personality and expressing themselves alongside the leader. Styling, shines, or even just a smile can give a that depth and gravity that makes every guy want to dance with that follow. 

Good chemistry obviously takes a huge part of making this happen. However, when you get the right song, with the right leader, and a good follow... Well that's the formula for a dance to become a memory.